


Why We Do This

by Mishael, moomkin



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Homophobia, M/M, Xenophobia, homophobic driven attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-14 02:20:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11198412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mishael/pseuds/Mishael, https://archiveofourown.org/users/moomkin/pseuds/moomkin
Summary: Sometimes we can lose track of our purpose.





	1. Chapter 1

Eli strode back to his room, his cap pulled down, his gaze fixed firmly on the ground in front of him. He did not want to talk to anyone. He did not want to see any glances thrown his way. He did not want to think about the debriefing he had just left.

No one had said anything about what had happened, but he knew they were all thinking about it. He could see it in their eyes, hear it unspoken in their words, read it in their expressions. He had nearly compromised the entire mission. The entire time he was waiting for the hammer to fall. Even now, he couldn’t help feeling like it was only a matter of time.

Eli did not look up until he had stepped through the doorway into his room, a tiny space with a pair of bunks against one wall and a narrow desk along the other. He didn’t even have his own ‘fresher here, having instead to share a communal one down the hall. Thankfully, though, he did not actually have to share this room during their brief stay on Coruscant. And it would be brief. Not for the first time, he wished he could have stayed aboard ship. As an ensign—still—he wasn’t entitled to much here planetside. 

As the lights came on, Eli froze, his eyes immediately drawn to the blood-red paint scrawled across the wall. _Alien lover. Commander’s pet._ Reaching up, he closed his hand in a fist around his hat as he yanked it from his head, not caring that he caught some of his hair at the same time. With his other hand, he slapped half-heartedly at the wall for the panel to close the door. After two attempts, he finally found it, and the door slid shut.

His eyes widened as he fell back a half step, and he could feel his ears going red as his gaze fell on the final, unrepeatable, partially-hidden slur on the back of the door glaring back at him. With a yell of frustration, he threw his hat at the offending graffiti, gasping in horror as the door immediately slid open again and his hat bounced harmlessly off Thrawn’s chest.

“Ensign Vanto?” Thrawn raised an eyebrow as his gaze dropped to the hat where it lay at his feet. Then he looked up at Eli again, a curious flicker in his eyes.

With a deep sigh, Eli sunk into the nearest bunk and threw his arm over his eyes. “You didn’t have to follow me.” A thought occurred to him, and he lifted his arm enough to peer at Thrawn. “Unless they’re calling me back?”

“No,” Thrawn murmured, and Eli felt his stomach drop as Thrawn took in the writing on the wall.

“Uh, just ignore that,” Eli said hastily, getting back to his feet. “I was about to clean it off.”

Thrawn stooped and picked up Eli’s hat, bringing it over to him silently. Feeling his cheeks grow warm, Eli accepted it with a muttered apology. He had to get Thrawn out of the room before he saw what was written on the back of the door.

Thrawn spoke before Eli could say anything. “You have been quiet and distracted since Narrim.”

“Yeah, well.” Eli shrugged, trying to move Thrawn back to the door without making it too obvious. “I’ll get over it. Now, if you don’t need me, I have things to do.” He waved vaguely at the mess on the wall.

Thrawn stared at him for a moment. Eli knew he was trying to read him, so he shoved all his thoughts down and put his best blank face on. He didn’t feel like being analyzed right now. Of course, Thrawn could probably read that as well. The only sign Eli could see of Thrawn’s own thoughts was the slight flattening of his mouth. Then Thrawn nodded and turned, striding away without another word.

He watched the Chiss’ retreating form with a strange sense of disappointment. Wasn’t that what he wanted? Wasn’t this what he was trying to do by effectively shooing Thrawn out the door? He wanted to be alone. He didn’t want to talk to anyone about what happened, not Thrawn, not anyone.

Falling back against the wall, he slid down to the floor, drawing his knees up to his chest and resting his arms across the top of them. The hat dangled loosely from his fingers. He stared blankly across the room, the words scribbled on the opposite wall taunting him. His mind ran through a list of names of who could be responsible. There was no evidence, of course. Perhaps the holocams could show who might have entered his room, but that wouldn’t matter. No action would be taken.

Should he have done differently? Should he have left it as the others would have done? He had reacted out of instinct, not thinking about his actions until it was too late. Closing his eyes, he could see it replaying in his mind. The small, canine creature running out into the open, causing his initial tension. But then the Twi’lek girl had chased after it, right into—

The sound of a bucket scraping the floor beside him startled him out of his thoughts, and he jumped. Blinking his eyes open, he saw that Thrawn had returned with cleaning supplies and was even now pulling on gloves.

Eli clambered to his feet. “Oh, sir, you didn’t have to—” He cut himself off, watching in dismay as Thrawn stepped toward the door and closed it, ugly words bared before him. Eli’s breath caught in his throat, and he saw Thrawn stiffen. The movement was barely noticeable, but Eli had learned to read the subtle motions of his commanding officer. Even so, Thrawn only paused for a moment. Then, as if he had not even noticed it, he bent down, grabbing one of the sponges in the foaming water of the bucket. Without a word, he began scrubbing away the crude phrase on the door.

With his heart in his throat, Eli grabbed another sponge and made his way to the other painted insults. For a few minutes, the only sound in the room was that of sponge on wall and in water. Thankfully, with just a bit of effort, the paint came off. It hadn’t fully dried yet. Soon, all evidence of it was confined to the tainted water of the bucket.

Thrawn looked around the room, his expression impassive. “I would have expected them to have you stay with me in my quarters,” he commented. No word about what had just happened.

Eli shrugged. “I’m just an ensign still, sir,” he said. “They would not offer me officer’s quarters.”

Thrawn’s eyes narrowed slightly. “But you are also my aide,” he replied, with a small tilt of his head. “Your quarters are near mine on ship. Why should that change here?”

“I don’t know why they do things the way they do sometimes,” Eli said with another sigh. There was no use explaining why he was being treated the way he was. It didn’t matter. “Anyway, thank you. You didn’t have to do that.”

“You didn’t deserve this,” Thrawn said quietly, indicating the defacing of the room. “And you don’t deserve this room. Come with me.”

“I don’t know, sir...”

“If there are any questions about it, I will address them myself.” Thrawn drew himself up, and Eli held back a smile. Thrawn may act innocent about it all he liked, but Eli knew that sometimes he gladly took advantage of others' discomfort and nervousness around him. Those glowing red eyes, so calculating in his ice-blue face, still sometimes sent a shiver down Eli’s back. Especially if he woke to that hovering near him. He was certain Thrawn did that on purpose.

Eli looked around the dismal room, the pale light casting everything in shades of grey. If he stayed here, he had nothing to look forward to the rest of the night but his own thoughts and worries, the replaying of events that could not be changed. There was a chance that someone might return, but he had a feeling the deed was done. As much as he didn’t want to discuss anything, he found that he also didn’t want to be alone. “Okay, yeah,” he said, moving to grab his things. “Thanks.”

Along the way, Thrawn returned the cleaning supplies he had borrowed. Thankfully, no one stopped them or questioned them, and they were able to continue on without issue. As soon as they were in the privacy of Thrawn’s quarters, Eli collapsed on the small couch, allowing himself to relax a little. Then Thrawn spoke.

“Your thoughts, Ensign.”

Eli turned slowly toward him where he had lowered himself into a nearby chair, catching those red eyes observing him closely. For a moment, he just stared back, trying to order his thoughts and decide what, if anything, he wanted to say. “I don’t know, sir,” he admitted at last, letting his head fall back and his eyes close. He still didn’t want to talk about it, but now he had put himself in a position where he might have to. Thrawn could be persistent. And maybe talking about it with someone who wouldn’t disparage him would help the voices grow quieter.

“You are upset about the mission.”

Eli chewed the inside of his lip as he opened his eyes halfway, his fingers playing idly with the cuff of his sleeve as he strove to carefully modulate his voice. “I...I guess I just didn’t expect that we would catch them in the act.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Thrawn nod. “It is barbaric,” he said quietly, his voice low and brittle.

Eli grimaced, releasing a slow breath through his nose. “It’s not as if it changes what they did, whether I saw it or not. I know that. And it’s still happening across the galaxy, with others. But still, seeing it...” He snapped his mouth shut, forcing down the growing anger he had felt on Narrim.

“We are doing our part, Ensign, to fight against such cruelties as this,” Thrawn reminded him gently. “That was the purpose of our mission.”

“Yes, and I nearly botched it!” Eli said, his voice rising with frustration and embarrassment. “I acted out of turn, and I just—” He stopped, sitting forward and burying his face in his hands. “It was automatic. She was just a child. I’ve heard—” His voice caught, and he just shook his head.

“They were captured in the end.”

“Yeah, but not after I nearly got some of us killed!” Eli stared down at his hands, now squeezed tightly into fists. 

Thrawn spoke softly, “You rescued the girl when others would have left her as lost. She was returned to her family because of you.”

Eli felt himself shaking, an echo of the adrenaline that had coursed through him when he saw her cowering in the shadows on the slavers’ ship and had risked his life going in after her. They almost didn’t make it out in time. 

“Only barely.” It had been a foolish move. The others made sure he knew it loud and clear the entire trip back to Coruscant. Never mind that their reasoning for the derision was because she had been an alien. Red painted words flashed through his mind again. Running his fingers through his hair, he growled, “I told you I wasn’t cut out for things like this.”

Thrawn was silent. Finally Eli looked up at him, meeting his calm, penetrating gaze. “Do you wish for me to have you reassigned?” Thrawn asked. It wasn’t the first time he had offered.

Part of Eli wanted to scream yes, and yet... 

Eli tried so hard to read Thrawn’s expression, but the Chiss was much better at concealing things than he was. All the same, he knew Thrawn’s offer was purely for Eli’s sake. He did not want Eli to go. Why, Eli couldn’t even begin to guess. Even after such a blunder as this.

Besides, if he did leave, then Culper’s implied threat regarding Thrawn’s future might carry through. He refused to allow that to happen. And there was something about seeing the gratitude of those he helped that was more satisfying than any word of approval for a job well done. He wouldn’t get that as a supply officer.

“No,” he answered at last.

Thrawn leaned forward, looking at Eli intensely. “Do not allow the opinions of others to distract you from what is important.”

Eli blinked, momentarily confused. “Excuse me, sir?”

“You are allowing the words of others to affect your own evaluation of your actions,” Thrawn said, his eyes glinting. “You believe you failed in your duty because the prejudiced opinions of others tell you your choices were wrong.” Thrawn pressed his lips together briefly. “I am sure the young girl whose life you saved would have something different to say.”

Eli swallowed, staring at the floor. “Yeah, but I still made a mistake, at least in revealing our position too soon.”

Thrawn’s head bowed in acquiescence. “That was due to inexperience. Mistakes can be remedied. There is always room for improvement. Those who do not recognize that are the true failures.” His eyes narrowed, their glow intensifying briefly.

Eli nodded, lacing his fingers together as he considered Thrawn’s words. “I’m sorry, sir,” he said, glancing up and catching Thrawn’s eye. Thrawn raised an eyebrow, and Eli lifted a shoulder in a half shrug. “Sorry for what was written on the wall in my room.”

“That was not your fault, Ensign,” Thrawn said with a curious tilt to his head. “That was due to the ignorance of others.” Eli startled when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He stared at the blue hand a moment, then looked up at Thrawn again. “Do not let that affect you, either,” Thrawn said softly. “The opinions of others do not matter. You must discern the right path yourself and stick to it, even if few travel it with you.” He grimaced. “Or if you travel it alone.”

Something had passed across his face then, and Eli felt an odd twinge in his chest. They stared at each other in silence for a moment. Then he smiled, reaching up to grip Thrawn’s hand in his own where it rested on his shoulder. “Thank you, sir. I will remember that.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From moomkin: honestly I read this fic and immediately had to push the story forward. XDDDD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From Mishael: The first chapter was originally intended as a stand-alone (and still could be, for those who wish), but moomkin and I have decided to try a collaboration branching off of it. So be sure to check the top of the chapter to see who wrote what!

It was late.  
  
Even through his grogginess, Eli was already suspicious. A call at the door… at this hour? There had to be something _dead_ important happening to go waking up an officer in the middle of the night. And Eli was almost entirely certain this wasn’t the case.  
  
Thrawn was on Coruscant. There was nothing so pressing that it couldn’t wait until morning. All the other staff officer types were certainly asleep at this hour.  
  
Eli’s thoughts immediately jumped to the only other reason he could fathom for the call at the door. He was in Thrawn’s quarters because his own had been vandalized. Thrawn had insisted that he stay with him. Eli couldn’t refuse, even if he thought the Chiss’s fears of a follow-up attack were unfounded.  
  
But now… in the middle of the night… could the one who vandalized his room be looking for more trouble? Would they know to look… here?  
  
The beep at the door sounded again.  
  
“Don’t,” Eli said, grabbing Thrawn’s arm as the Chiss got up to answer the door.  
  
“But someone is requesting me,” Thrawn said.  
  
Eli bit his lip, knowing that Thrawn’s personal code of ethics wouldn’t let him leave the call unanswered. His felt his heart skip a beat, and tried his best to swallow back his doubt. There very well could be something serious that came up… and Thrawn was already walking a razor’s edge. If he didn’t answer the door, and it had been official-  
  
Though the situation in the room was compromising to say the least if it _was_ an official caller. Thrawn’s room only had one bed – it was meant for one officer. Which naturally meant Thrawn and Eli shared it. Eli had laid down with completely serious intentions about just going to sleep after the day he’d had… intentions which quickly took a sharp turn once Thrawn peeled off his uniform… laid down next to him… wrapped him in his arms…  
  
Eli smiled briefly at the thought. That Chiss was impossible to deny.  
  
Eli glanced up as Thrawn put on a robe. Even in the darkness of the room, even if it were just his silhouette, Eli could chase away almost any negative thought with just a glance. _Alien lover_ the graffiti had said. Well… he thought they’d been pretty good at keeping it a secret.  
  
Then again, he recalled the teasing from the other officers. His face warmed briefly.  
  
There were so many things that could go wrong with their relationship. Thrawn had literally picked apart the Imperial regulations on fraternization, pointing out that relationships developed before military service were excused (Thrawn argued this was the case as they had met before he’d officially joined the Navy), plus relationships made while at the same rank were excused (Thrawn argued that when they were at the Royal Imperial Academy, they’d been at the same station, if not technically at the same rank). Though that was saying nothing about an interspecies relationship… honestly Eli was sure the issue hadn’t come up in the navy.  
  
Not like he wanted to see the issue brought forth. Thrawn already had enough enemies…  
  
Eli reached down, blinding feeling for his clothes which he knew were on the floor somewhere. If it was an official caller…  
  
Thrawn was at the door, and Eli clumsily snaked his legs through his trousers as well as he could underneath the covers. His heart rate picked up once again, but Thrawn’s confidence was so soothing…  
  
The door slid open.  
  
And the high pitched _wub_ of a blaster on stun was as startling as a canon blast. The room lit up with the blue glow from the weapon for just a moment, just long enough to illuminate the outlines of several men in the doorway.  
  
Thrawn slumped over. His attackers let him fall to the ground.  
  
For a wild moment, Eli had no idea what to do. His heart was beating so loudly that it drowned out his thoughts. He’d never been good at confrontations, and this... it was so unexpected. Things like this just didn’t happen…  
  
“He alone?” one of the voices said.  
  
One of them ignited a flashlight, the light of it blindingly intense. Eli lifted a hand to block the light. He winced through the glare, trying to make out the figures, when suddenly he was dragged out of bed in one rough motion and thrown to the ground.  
  
“Just like a good pet to run to your master when you get scared?”  
  
A boot to the chest silenced any response Eli would have given.  
  
“Shut the door.”  
  
The light from the hallway vanished as the door swiped closed. Eli’s heart rate spiked at the realization that they were locked in now with them. Mind racing, trying to think of a way out – if only he could find his commlink…  
  
Eli was still sucking in his breath from the kick, struggling to find his way to his hands and knees, when he noticed he was surrounded.  
  
One of the intruders gave a snorted laugh, “Wait, were they in bed together?”  
  
Another boot to the chest, this time, powerful enough to flip Eli onto his back. He curled up, arms wrapping around himself, coughing.  
  
“We asked you a question.”  
  
Eli looked up, but all he could see was the light. It was painfully intense. Bright enough to make Eli’s eyes water.  
  
“Look, he’s crying.”  
  
“We haven’t given him anything to cry about yet.”  
  
Eli gritted his teeth together. “Come on, then,” he growled.  
  
“Grab him.”  
  
Eli couldn’t even see where the attack was coming from – before he could put up much of a resistance, arms were wrapping around him, yanking him back to his feet. He struggled against the hold, but an arm wrapped around his neck before he could counter the move. He clawed desperately at the arm, but from nowhere, he received another blow to the ribs.  
  
Gasping for air, Eli continued the struggle – and then stopped.  
  
“You get worked up seeing aliens hurt,” one of the men taunted. Eli thought his heart rate was high before – but when Thrawn’s still unconscious body was thrown into the light, Eli felt his heart beats as painfully as stabs.  
  
“No,” Eli said, trying to tear the arm away from his neck.  
  
“Willing to let humans die to save them.”  
  
Eli’s eyes flitted around the room. They were wearing officer’s uniforms… with the rank plaques noticeably missing. They had to be officers familiar with Thrawn… with Eli… ones from their own ship? Ones who had been on the mission? Or did they simply hear about it. No… they were angry… passionately angry.

“How worked up you imagine he’ll get seeing what we’ve got planned for this one?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by Mishael

“You can’t get away with this!” Eli gasped desperately, struggling against the arms holding him. “He’s an officer of the Imperial Navy. Do you really think they’ll turn a blind eye?”

The men laughed, and he felt the arms tighten around his chest and neck. “Do you think they’ll turn a blind eye to you sharing his room?” a gravelly voice muttered in his ear, and Eli shuddered.

“It’s nothing,” Eli said, pouring as much nonchalance into his voice as he could. “I’m his aide. We are usually together.”

“His aide, is it?” one of the other men scoffed. “Is that what they’re calling it these days?”

Eli’s face flushed with anger. “If you have a problem, why don’t you bring it up with Commander Thrawn through official means? Why do you have to break into his room like criminals?”

“Criminals, eh? You want to know what’s criminal?” The man who had dragged Thrawn into the light now knelt beside his limp form, gripping Thrawn’s chin and turning his head as if inspecting a prize animal. “Things like this!” he spat, releasing his hold roughly and throwing his hands out in disgust. A growl escaped Eli, but a strike to his solar plexus quickly silenced him. “The Empire was supposed to take care of things like this, not repeat the same mistakes as the Old Republic.” As he spoke, the man dug something out of his pocket then brought his hand back to Thrawn’s face. Eli couldn’t quite see, but he thought the man may have put something in Thrawn’s mouth.

“What are you—” Eli’s interjection was quickly cut off by a blow to the face. His cheek stung, and he could taste blood.

“I am curious, though,” the man continued, as if nothing had happened. “Does he bleed blue?”

Eli’s eyes widened as a short blade glinted in the pool of light illuminating the floor where the man still knelt beside Thrawn. He traced the blade along Thrawn’s throat, the blade shadowed by the man’s fingers in a mockery of tenderness. 

“Don’t touch him!” Eli snarled, pulling yet again at the restraining arms enveloping him. It infuriated him to feel so helpless.

The man’s sharp eyes briefly caught Eli’s, glinting from under the cap he wore. “Don’t worry, boy,” he said in a low, dangerous voice. “My interest is purely...scientific.”

Eli stared, begging silently for any movement from Thrawn. How high of a stun setting had they used on him? The knife had reached Thrawn’s collar bone and continued its slow journey downward, the pressure increasing the further it traveled. The top of Thrawn’s robe lay open, his chest exposed, and Eli felt his throat close as the knife neared Thrawn’s heart.

“Please—don’t—” Eli pleaded, wincing as he heard his voice break.

Without warning, Thrawn’s arm snapped upward from where it had lain awkwardly twisted behind his back. The man’s grip on the knife was knocked loose by the unexpected movement, and the knife clattered as it skidded across the floor.

Right to Eli’s feet.

The sudden distraction was just what he needed break from the hold on him as he threw himself forward, knocking his captor off balance. He glanced over at Thrawn even as his hand closed around the hilt of the knife, catching Thrawn’s vice-like grip on the man’s arm and the deadly gleam in those red eyes as he pulled himself up until he was face-to-face with the man.

“Do it! Do it!” the man yelled, turning his face away from Thrawn and hiding it in the crook of his other arm, looking for all the world like a frightened child.

But before Eli even had a chance to celebrate the turn of events, a loud hissing sound filled the air, quickly following by a hissing cry from Thrawn himself as he twitched away like he had been burned. Eli took a breath, about to speak, and immediately regretted it as his eyes and lungs were seared by the spray back. At the same time, the man behind him stomped mercilessly on his hand, and his stomach clenched as he heard a distinct crunch. Pain shot up his arm, and his hold on the knife loosened automatically. A boot kicked the knife away from him, and he fell back, cradling his hand against his chest as a blur of motion filled the room.

The man who had been kneeling beside Thrawn was suddenly launched across the floor and hit the edge of the bed with a pained grunt. Feet scuffed across the floor as the others scrambled to restrain the wild Chiss. For a moment, even Eli felt a thrill of terror shoot through him. He still couldn’t see very well, his hand hurt like blazes, and everything was thrown into confusion. Guilt pressed at him to jump up and help instead of cowering in the corner between the bed and the wall where he currently lay, gasping for breath.

By the time he managed to gather enough energy and willpower to push himself to his feet and launch himself into the fray, someone had stumbled toward him. It took him a moment to realize that it was Thrawn, his arm thrown over his face as if to protect it from attack. Eli froze. Did Thrawn know it was him, or was he about to fall under blind attack as well?

“Hey, hey, it’s me!” he muttered quietly, torn between reaching out to him and avoiding having his other arm broken by accident.

“I know,” Thrawn gasped, pushing Eli back onto the floor and into the corner as he positioned himself between Eli and the others like a shield. Even in the dim light cast by the flashlight and the residual blurriness from the spray, Eli could see Thrawn’s face twisted in pain and fury. “I’m sorry.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> moomkin chapter. I'm severely sleep deprived. short. maybe nonsense.

Thrawn had not expected the second attack. 

He’d been laying still, as deathly still as he could. Even when he heard those men strike Eli… even when something bitter was shoved to the back of his throat, even when he felt the blade of a knife against his skin. He kept his focus, he waited. Looking for the perfect opportunity. 

He had no idea how long he’d been knocked out, but he recalled coming to – a gruff man folding his arms behind his back, weakly binding them together. Knowing his glowing eyes would give his consciousness away, Thrawn had kept them closed… listening. Trying to determine the situation.

What the men were in the room for, Thrawn could only guess that a lack of reaction from the graffiti had compelled them to do more. Perhaps they’d seen Eli leave with him… maybe they just made a guess. 

Using his presumed unconsciousness to his advantage, Thrawn had begun planning his attack. They didn’t know he was conscious, that it barely took any effort to wriggle a wrist out of his binds… the timing was all that he needed to be certain of. The other men were loud – Thrawn counted no more than four. 

He certainly surprised his attackers. 

Unfortunately they had flipped the tables quickly. 

The first sensation was of something wet and bitterly cold splashed onto his face. The feeling didn’t last long. Quickly after, whatever substance had been sprayed onto him turned to fire. Each individual molecule of the stuff became sharp, piercing, driving agonizing burns into his skin. His eyes burned, his skin was on fire… it even affected his lungs… it was like drowning in flames. And when he tried to open his eyes, the intensity of the flashlight seemed to have magnified… the light itself was another source of pain… 

Thrawn tried to hold back, but a hissing cry escaped his lips regardless. 

And he prepared himself for the counter attack. 

Thrawn heard Eli scream out – not the kind of scream Thrawn would expect from him if he’d also been hit with the spray. No, this was something else. Something much more intense… The momentary distraction was all that was needed. Thrawn felt one of the men grab him. 

He reached out, countering the man’s attempt to restrain him. The next moment Thrawn shoved him as hard as he could, hopefully in the direction of the others. Thrawn focused for a moment, listening, wondering where Eli was in all this mess. 

Trying to open his eyes again, he got a sense of the room, though the pain was getting to be horrible. It took all his resolve not to scratch at his face, though he couldn’t stop a gagging cough – his lungs were still aflame. But he had to subdue the pain… he had to find Eli. 

He got a sense of the room, the figures ready to fight, and one that wasn’t. Eli. He made a dash to that side of the room, knowing the others would be right on his heels, but knowing he had to do what he could to protect Eli. 

“Hey, hey, it’s me!” Eli called out. 

“I know.” Thrawn turned back around, ready to face the men, knowing it was very likely that he could fail. “I’m sorry.” 

The attack came. Thrawn attempted to open his eyes, but the searing pain was impossible to endure. It nearly dulled him to the blows as they came. A jab to his abdomen, another swing at his face. He took the strikes as best as he could, grunts escaping as he still fought the burning in his lungs. 

Without being able to see where the attackers were, Thrawn knew any attack of his own would be wild – mostly likely not landing… but he had to do something. His plan couldn’t be simply to hide in a corner and wait for the sound to wake up others. 

Thrawn struck on that idea and instantly bellowed as loud as he could.

“LEAVE MY QUARTERS NOW.” 

The sound echoed off the walls, and for a moment, the fight stopped altogether.

Thrawn took another deep breath, and even though his lungs were burning, he went to scream again and- 

Too late. A punch to the solar plexus cut him off. An arm wrapped around his neck and threw him to the floor, where he was greeted by a boot stomping down on his shoulder. Thrawn grunted in response.

“Hold that one.” 

At least two of the men fell on top of him, pinning him to the ground. 

"You two are a funny pair," a voice whispered in his ear. "So many things screwed up with you. That boy there... has to learn how disgusting loving an alien is... well... not sure which is worst... sleeping with an alien or sleeping with a man... and doing both at once?"

“And you...you don’t seem to mind watching humans get hurt. Funny that you’re so attached to this one. We think you need to be taught a lesson, alien scum. We think you need to feel what we feel when you send humans into harms way.” 

Thrawn managed to open his eyes, fearing what had happened, looking for Eli. To find that he’d been grabbed already. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by Mishael

Thrawn swore under his breath in Cheunh. Pain and adrenaline coursed through him like fire and ice, and he could feel himself trembling because of it. The men restraining him were taking greater care this time, holding him in place none too gently, and he wasn’t sure that he would be able to wrestle himself free in time to stop whatever they were going to do to Eli.

His throat tightened. He should have been more cautious when he answered the door. It had been unwise to approach it unarmed, given his own earlier concerns after the vandalism of Eli’s room. But he had still been in the process of rousing himself from a deep sleep at the time; and honestly, he had not truly thought the culprits would be this foolish.

Before anyone else could speak, the sound of someone at the door threw the room into a silent hush. Thrawn risked a glance. The men were staring anxiously at one another. He caught Eli’s eye, squinting in pain as his body screamed for him to close them again. If only he could fall face first in the snow right now...

The trilling beep sounded again, followed by a muffled voice. “Sir, are you all right? Do you require assistance?”

“Ah!” one of the men spoke softly into Thrawn’s ear as he felt Thrawn tense—the man who seemed to be in charge. “Don’t answer. Not yet.” He motioned to one of the others holding Eli, and Thrawn heard Eli’s quiet gasp as the knife from earlier showed itself again, positioned now at the base of Eli’s jaw. Thrawn obediently kept his mouth shut, although the light in his narrowed eyes flashed and his mouth flattened in barely restrained anger.

“Now,” the man continued, his voice a sinister whisper against Thrawn’s cheek. “You will go and answer the door, and you will tell whoever is on the other side that everything is fine. Make up whatever excuse you need to, but if you give him any hint that we’re here or that there’s trouble, you’ll quickly find yourself arrested for murder.”

Thrawn’s stomach turned over at the implied threat, his eyes meeting Eli’s again before he finally squeezed them shut once more. Then his stomach clenched again, this time much more painfully, and he sucked in a startled breath, wincing at the unexpected pang of discomfort. 

The man chuckled darkly. “Finally kicking in, I see.”

Glowing slits of fury turned in the man’s direction, even as Thrawn’s brows drew downward in a frown. Then he remembered. Of course. The man had forced something down his throat. He gritted his teeth, his glare brightening fiercely even as another wave knocked the breath from him. The man nodded emphatically at the door, and both he and the other man who had been holding Thrawn pulled the Chiss to his feet. They then guided him roughly to the door, releasing him and stepping out of view of whoever might be on the other side. The flashlight clicked off.

The door sounded again. “Sir, are you all right?” the voice repeated emphatically. “Do you need me to come in?”

Thrawn’s burning gaze fell on the shadows of each man in turn. Would they seriously kill Eli here in his own room and expect to get away with framing him for it? His eyes rested on Eli last of all, and he caught his breath. It wasn’t worth the risk of calling their bluff. If the men had wanted them dead, they would already be so. But there was the chance that they could be pushed too far, especially if any or all of them were currently acting under the influence of something more than a mere superiority complex. No, it was more important that they both get out of this alive. If it meant a moment of suffering and humiliation while these idiots made their point, then they would have to endure.

The stars help them if they crossed the line.

His stomach cramped again, and he bent forward, gasping for breath, clutching at his midsection with one hand while leaning against the wall with the other. Quiet sniggering came from the group huddled in the darkness behind him, but he ignored it.

His fingers found the door’s release, and suddenly light from the hallway fell around him. He winced, squeezing his eyes shut against the persistent stinging pain of the light on his eyes and forcing his stomach to settle. He knew he must look a mess as he stood there leaning against—no, clutching desperately at the doorframe, but there was nothing to be done about it.

“Uh...sir?” The trooper in the hall fell back half a step, clearly not expecting such a sight. “Is everything all right?”

“Yes,” Thrawn growled, opening his eyes to narrow slits of glowing red. The trooper’s helmet hid his expression, but he could see the man’s body tense and his hands grip his blaster a little more tightly.

“Are you sure?” the trooper asked after a brief, awkward silence. Clearly he sensed something more must be going on.

Biting back the retort that came to his mind, Thrawn just shook his head. “Merely a bad reaction to a meal, trooper. I apologize for the misunderstanding. I assure you, everything is under control.”

The trooper nodded slowly and backed off. “Let me know if you need anything, sir,” he said, stiffening briefly to attention.

Thrawn nodded and stepped back into his room, closing the door without another word.

~

Eli felt his rage steadily increasing as he watched Thrawn stumble toward the door, clearly in agony, forced by the knifepoint aimed at Eli’s own neck to turn away their only source of rescue from this nightmarish situation. The moment the door slid closed again, two of the men jumped on Thrawn, dragging him away from the door and practically throwing him against the wall opposite from where Eli was still being held firmly by the two others. The flashlight flicked to life, zeroing in on Thrawn where he lay slumped against the wall, an arm curled pitifully around his stomach, eyes closed and face turned away from the offending light, expression struggling to maintain an air of calm and control.

Thrawn’s lack of response to this sent a spike of fear through Eli. Had he given up? Or was he more incapacitated than he appeared? Perhaps—hopefully—he was merely preparing himself for the next move. Even so, Eli felt his own stomach twist uneasily.

“Pathetic,” muttered the man holding the flashlight, his voice dripping with revulsion. He had been the one to put a knife to Thrawn earlier, and the one who had forced him to turn the trooper away at the door. Out of the corner of his eye, Eli saw him make a movement with his hand. Before Eli could try to decipher what it meant, one of the men beside him suddenly reached over and grabbed Eli’s broken hand, pulling it away from his chest and bending it back at an excruciating angle. Eli cried out in pain as he fell to his knees. Something was immediately shoved into his mouth to stifle the sound, and he choked against it.

That provoked a response. Thrawn was on his feet immediately, but the man held out a hand warningly. “Ah ah! Not so fast.” Again Eli felt the knife at his throat, and his face grew hot with rage. What were they playing at?! What was the point of all of this? Torturing for the sake of perverted pleasure? He tried to spit out the gag, but it was only pressed in deeper as a result.

Thrawn bared his teeth as he hissed in fury; his hands were clenched tightly at his sides, the muscles in his legs taut and ready to spring. His eyes blazed furiously, and even from where he knelt on the floor, Eli could see moisture at the corners of those red eyes—although whether it was from the light or from emotion, he couldn’t tell. Possibly both.

“You see this helplessness? You _feel_ it?” the man continued, as if he were merely giving a lecture in the classroom. “This inability to do anything, simply because of the decisions of someone else? Maddening, isn’t it?” The grin that had spread across his face sent a shiver down Eli’s spine. The man was crazy.

Thrawn suddenly collapsed to one knee, gasping for breath and clutching at his middle as if on the verge of losing everything in his stomach. At this, the man who had been hiding just beyond the edge of the light jumped in, landing a punch across Thrawn’s cheek, knocking Thrawn further to his hands and knees. Then, in a swift motion he yanked on Thrawn’s robe, pulling it off harshly and kicking him to the ground.

At that, Eli lost all sense of control. No longer registering the pain in his hand or the unpleasantness of the gag in his mouth, he leapt to his feet, using his elbow to knock the wind from the man immediately behind him and ducking out of the reach of the other. He blew past the man with the flashlight, who was too startled himself even to react. Eli skidded to a stop in front of Thrawn, grabbing the man who had attacked the Chiss and throwing him with unexpected force back toward the others. Chest heaving, Eli then turned and positioned himself in a protective stance over his fallen companion. 

It was time for this to stop.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR THIS DUMPSTER FIRE OF A CHAPTER.
> 
> So apparently I'm a horrible perv and completely misread Mish's subtleties and umm... she didn't mean for it to be read the way I did, but since I made my damn bed, I'm laying in it. I cringed with every word I wrote. I'm not too comfortable writing this kind of stuff - also, upped the ratings just to be safe, but.... ugh... you guys. Why am I like this?
> 
> Please ignore this horrible garbage. I loath it. And I loath what I've done to Mish's lovely, perfectly wonderful-by-itself fisrt-chapter-was-originally-a-one-shot.
> 
> \--moomkin

There were a lot things Eli was willing to endure.  
  
He’d learned from a young age that sometimes the best way to get a fight over with as quickly as possible was not to fight back at all. He was horrible at fighting anyways. When these guys stormed into their room, he’d fallen back to his normal route – take the punches. And hope it would be over soon.  
  
He’d even endured the humiliation of having some stranger’s dick shoved into his mouth. It was disgusting. It was uncomfortable. And horrifically embarrassing. Even when Thrawn reacted as angrily as he did, Eli put up with it. It wasn’t just the knife at his throat. He was afraid of provoking them to do something worse. _Put up with it, and hope it ends soon._  
  
And then something worse happened anyways - one of the men disrobed Thrawn.  
  
It was impossible not to see what they had in mind now… Thrawn, unable to defend himself. Whatever it was that was causing his pain had left him physically helpless, on all fours… suddenly naked before their attackers.  
  
There were a lot of things Eli was willing to endure, but letting anyone try and abuse Thrawn like that…  
  
Suddenly the knife at his throat didn’t matter. The fact that his hand was broken, forgotten. Eli had to do something.  
  
At least the first attack was easy enough. He knew he didn’t _need_ a lot of force, but he put nearly all his strength into his shoulders, slamming his fist into the guy in front of him, a demolishing blow right to his balls. The man stumbled away, howling in pain. The knife at Eli’s throat, a threat to force compliance, didn’t deliver its promised punishment.  
  
Eli ducked away from it easily, realizing with a certain wave of confidence that these men were not going to kill them.  
  
He shoved his way to Thrawn’s side, though as he wheeled on the others, it dawned on him that he was preparing himself to fight four men… when before his philosophy was to take the beatings and hope it would somehow work itself out. And yet he wasn’t afraid.  
  
“YOU’RE NOT GOING TO TOUCH HIM,” Eli roared, eyeing the men to see where the first attack would come.  
  
But the response he got from their attackers only proved they were not at all intimidated by his enthusiasm.  
  
The leader laughed.  
  
“You better not have hurt my friend too badly, _ensign_ ,” the man said. “He’s a ranking officer. Do you have any idea what the punishment for attacking a superior officer is?”  
  
Eli growled. He didn’t want to talk… the distraction was giving his adrenaline enough time to fade… which might have been exactly what this guy had in mind. But he took the bait anyways. Stupidly wanting to prove this guy’s plan wrong.  
  
“Yeah, and how is he going to explain it?” Eli asked. To him, it was obvious – the reason why a guy would get hurt like that _there_? The man would have to be an idiot to risk facing a charge of sexual assault just to try and pin assaulting a superior officer on him.  
  
“You _do_ have the reputation for such things,” the leader teased. “These kind of activities are frowned upon but not illegal. I’m sure my friend wouldn’t mind a slight tarnish on his image if it meant you’d land up in prison … and you know, the severity of the punishment depends on the severity of the crime… I can only imagine how a court martial would classify such an aggressive attack. You’d be looking at _years._ ”  
  
The threat hung on the air as the room descended into silence. The man Eli had struck was whimpering in the corner. Thrawn was still gagging, a hand on Eli’s ankle, as though a nonverbal way to beg for him to stop putting himself in danger.  
  
Eli growled again, realizing that he had talked himself right into blackmail. “So what now?”

“You _could_ try to fight us,” the man went on. “With your broken hand, I don’t think you’ll get very far. And we’ll still get our way in the end.” He licked his lips, as though what they had in mind hadn’t been clear before. “Or you can stand aside-”  
  
“Yeah, you wish,” Eli said with an all-too-confident laugh. Looks like the adrenaline hadn’t worn off so much after all. He cocked his head slightly, his hands in fists. “Come on and get it then. Ain’t no such thing as a free lunch.”  
  
At least Eli was able to pull off the illusion that he wasn’t even phased by the threats. One of the men lunged at him and Eli swung – still only barely aware of his broken hand. His fist connected with the other guy’s face – and Eli screamed.  
  
He probably sounded half-insane, as his anger and pain morphed together in what became a monstrous growl. He didn’t slow his momentum, though. He came back at the man with his right elbow, slamming the sharp bone into the man’s jaw.  
  
Eli could feel the bone give away, and the man stumbled into the darkness.  
  
“Two down,” Eli taunted, his eyes glittering with the drunkenness of success as he glared at the leader. “You coming or not?”  
  
The leader, for once, didn’t have anything to say.  
  
To fill the awkward silence, Thrawn finally threw up.  
  
And continued to do so.  
  
He tried to hold it back, fearing that somehow it might turn the fight against Eli, but Eli didn’t slow down, instead using the opportunity to lunge at the leader. Though Thrawn couldn’t open his mouth without retching, and as much as he was immobilized by his illness, he still tried to reach out to get Eli’s attention.  
  
He couldn’t shout, but Eli could.  
  
And thinking as desperately as he could, “Just shout for the guard, Eli!”  
  
The stormtrooper who had visited his quarters barely a few minutes earlier… he still had to be on guard out there somewhere. He had to be able to hear them. All Eli had to do was sound the alarm – how could Eli not have thought of that?  
  
Once the knife was gone – once his life was no longer in danger – the logical thing would have been to raise the alarm again.  
  
Though daring a glance up at Eli, Thrawn had to admit that he was holding his own admirably.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by Mishael

“Coward!” Eli snapped angrily as the flashlight continued to dance just out of his reach. “The lot of you, cowards!” His hand was throbbing, and in the wavering light he could see the swelling and discoloration already. But that didn’t matter. The pain only fueled his wrath.

“Cowards?” the voice behind the flashlight snarled. “For trying to keep you from making a mistake that will ruin the rest of your life?” A snort of disgust. “At least we don’t act against the laws of nature.”

Eli laughed hollowly, his hands dropping from where he had them braced in front of him. “I’m sorry,” he said, with an incredulous shake of his head. “I must have completely misread your threats and intentions then, because I’m pretty sure what you had planned was ‘against the laws of nature,’ as you put it.” He spat emphatically to the side, glancing toward the corner where one of the men still lay curled in on himself.

“You watch your tongue, boy,” the man growled, and the light shifted again. “You have no idea what you’re getting yourself involved with.”

Eli’s eyes narrowed. “No, you have no idea,” he said, raising his fists again and keeping Thrawn within his peripheral vision. The Chiss was still hunched over on the floor, but he had gone still. Eli resisted the urge to run to his side, knowing that turning his back right now would be a bad idea. “ _You’re_ the ones who barged in here, uninvited and unwelcome, with the intent to harm. We have done nothing.”

“Done nothing?” the man repeated in a mocking voice. “Is that what you told Cartar’s family?” Eli felt his expression falter as he fell back half a step. So that was what sparked this. “Is that what you said to Timmel and Poulosky on the return journey from your last mission?”

“I—n-no,” Eli stammered, feeling both defensive and guilty at the reminder of those who had been hurt or even killed on some of their more dangerous missions. He couldn’t let the man discover Eli’s own recent struggles with this issue, or he would press all the harder, further distracting Eli from what he needed to do here and now. “Being a part of the Navy comes with certain risks. We all know that.”

“Yes, but many risks can be avoided,” the other man continued, his voice filled with anger and bitterness. “If one’s priorities are in order. You would understand that better if you didn’t let that alien corrupt your loyalties.”

The moment the words were out of the man’s mouth, Eli’s own doubts disappeared in the flames of rage once more. “Commander Thrawn has always done everything possible to preserve as many lives as he could!” Eli said, his cheeks flushing red. “He’s not prejudiced only to help humans but seeks to protect all life, unlike you and others like you! Maybe you find that repulsive, but I find it noble. It is an honor to serve with him.”

The man snorted again. “Oh, I’m sure your service to him goes far beyond honorable—”

With an unintelligible cry, Eli threw himself at the man behind the flashlight, catching him by surprise. They fell to the floor with a crash, the flashlight flickering as it hit the ground. Eli hissed as his hand was jarred in the fall, but blind fury quickly replaced the pain as he scuffled with the officer, neither of them quite getting the right angle to land a solid hit. They rolled across the floor until they bumped into the bed, Eli finally managing to stun the man temporarily with a blow to the temple. That was when he remembered that his sudden attack had left Thrawn undefended, with the other assailant still lurking in the shadows. His heart dropped to his stomach, and he turned and scrambled back to his feet, his eyes immediately going back to where Thrawn had been.

The other man had not hesitated to take advantage of Eli’s distraction. He had jumped on Thrawn, attacking with a viciousness that made Eli’s blood boil. He was relieved to see that Thrawn had not been rendered entirely helpless, or perhaps the attack had roused the last remaining reserves of his strength, as he fought back with equal ferocity. Eli rushed toward them.

He had barely taken two steps, however, when he saw the beam from the flashlight sweep across the room, disorienting him briefly before he realized that the other man must have regained his feet. Seconds later something solid and hard smashed into the side of his skull, and he went down, blacking out temporarily. But he fought unconsciousness with everything he had, his vision quickly returning as he blinked his eyes several times to refocus. He would not let them win. He had to get to Thrawn.

Heaving himself to his hands and knees, he saw Thrawn and his attacker still struggling by the wall, and the legs of the man with the flashlight moving toward them. With a burst of rage-induced energy, he launched himself at those legs, knocking the man off his feet again, and he fell with a loud grunt. But instead of attacking him once he was down, Eli stumbled toward Thrawn and the other man. He had to separate them before something worse happened.

His eyes widened as he reached the pair. There was blood on the floor. Without regard for the wisdom of such a move, he leapt into the tangle of grappling arms and legs, grabbing a handful of the other man’s hair and yanking up with all his might. The man screamed at the unexpected pain, automatically releasing his hold on Thrawn to reach up and grip Eli’s hand where it was buried in his hair. Eli pulled again, wrapping an arm around the man’s chest and hauling him backward, throwing him roughly to the ground. The knife from earlier clattered to floor beside him, and his arm shot out quickly to pick it up, brandishing it toward the man who glared back at him with a furious gaze as he rubbed the back of his head.

“You son of a—aaaaaah!” The man screamed again as Eli’s arm twitched, driving the blade deep into the man’s thigh. With a merciless tug, he pulled the knife free, leaving a gaping wound in the man’s leg. He clutched at his leg in agony, moaning loudly in pain.

Eli fell back, withdrawing immediately to Thrawn’s side. Thrawn was gasping for breath and holding his side, his fingers and stomach streaked with blood.

“What happened?” Eli asked, struggling to keep his voice under control as his eyes darted between the approaching light and the blood staining Thrawn’s body and the floor beneath him. He held the knife warningly toward the remaining man—the leader, who now drew near with murder in his eyes. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Thrawn’s robe and used his foot to pull it closer, then drew it up and around Thrawn where he lay curled on the floor beside him.

“It’s...it’s nothing,” Thrawn rasped, gritting his teeth. His eyes were closed tightly against the pain. “It’s just...a shallow wound...from the knife...easily managed...” Eli could see Thrawn’s face and hair were damp with perspiration. “Eli...you must...call for help...”

“So he does bleed red, then. Pity. Blue would have been more interesting.”

Eli glared up at the man behind the light, who had now stopped about a meter away. “I suggest you get your men out of here right now before I finish the job,” Eli said, his voice low and threatening, his eyes glinting dangerously.

The man didn’t laugh this time.

“He does have you whipped, doesn’t he?” the man murmured, taunting. “Poor young boy from Wild Space, duped by a non-human from the barbaric wastes beyond, trained as his pet and concubine.” Eli bared his teeth, his hands curling into fists, the pain in his right hand now causing that entire arm to grow steadily numb. “For all I know, that’s what his kind does with your people,” the man continued in a condescending manner. “Perhaps it seems normal to you because you haven’t been taught any better.”

“How dare you?” Eli hissed, jumping to his feet. “How _dare_ you?! After what you’ve come here and done? You know _nothing!_ ”

“Yes, I think it’s about time this sickening behavior is exposed, before anyone else gets hurt.” The man kept his eyes fixed on Eli, and Eli thought he could see a thin trail of blood on the man’s cheek from when he had hit him earlier. “Look at what he has made you to do your own kind, boy.” The three other men were laid out in the dark, either unconscious or whimpering from their injuries. “Your own kind! And he used you to do it, manipulating you so that his own hands remain clean. How can you not see that?”

“You know nothing!” Eli yelled again, dropping the knife in front of Thrawn and bringing up his fists. “Get out! GET OUT!” With that, he charged the leader, putting his full weight behind the motion, intending to throw him off balance again. The man had expected him this time and stepped to the side, grabbing Eli and using his own momentum to throw him to the floor. The impact with the floor knocked the air from Eli, and he lay momentarily dazed. Then the man was on top of him, flipping him onto his back and straddling him, striking him with his fists over and over again. All Eli could think to do was throw his arms in front of his face, but the defensive action was futile. The man was out of control, and Eli couldn’t move with the man’s larger body pinning him down. Moving his arms away from his face exposed it to the flurry of punches raining down on him, so all he could do was wait it out and hope that his cry had been heard.

An agonizingly long minute later, the door slid open, and standing in the light of the hallway were three stormtroopers, their blasters drawn.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter by Mishael.
> 
> Wrapping up the story here, folks!

The man pinning Eli tensed at the sudden intrusion, but then he rose to his feet, a mask of relief and authority falling into place. “It’s about time—”

Without warning, the bright blue spark of the stun beam flashed, and the man fell over without another word. More flashes lit up the room, one for each of the other men even as they lay incapacitated on the floor. Eli stared, his heart pounding despite the initial relief that had flooded him when the door opened.

And then he was staring down the barrel of a blaster. The last thing he saw was that bright blue light as it washed over him as well.

~

“I’m never forgiving them for that.” The scowl on Eli’s face was fierce.

“They did not know you were with me,” Thrawn explained calmly as he lowered himself carefully beside Eli where he lay stretched out on the bed. “It was a temporary measure intended to defuse the situation immediately.”

“I would think that with the way the guy was beatin’ the livin’ daylights outta me, it woulda been obvious,” Eli growled, his accent growing slightly heavier in his frustration. The corner of Thrawn’s mouth twitched upward. Eli caught it and glared at him. “You think this is funny.”

“No, of course not.” Thrawn reached out and placed a hand tentatively on Eli’s leg. “How are you feeling?”

“All right, I guess, given the circumstances,” Eli admitted reluctantly. He flexed his hand as he inspected it. “Although bacta can only heal so much.”

Thrawn’s mouth flatted into a grimace. “I am sorry, Eli,” he said quietly. “Had I known this would happen, I would never have opened the door.”

“Yeah, but you couldn’t have known,” Eli said back with a half-hearted shrug. “I’m just sorry there are people out there like that.” And he hated the thought that, while he never would have acted out on such prejudices, he could have easily ended up on the wrong side of that line himself. He still remembered his first reaction to meeting a Chiss in real life and couldn’t help feeling ashamed of all the assumptions and rumors his people had made regarding Thrawn’s people. Thrawn had found it amusing, but even now Eli could feel his cheeks warming just at the remembrance.

“Thank you.” 

Eli’s head shot up at the quiet words of gratitude. “What for?”

“Things could have turned out much worse had you not acted as you did,” Thrawn said, bowing his head.

“Aw, well, I can’t really take the credit,” Eli mumbled, staring at his hand again and wiggling his fingers. “It just sort of happened. I admit that I didn’t really think about it.”

“I know.”

Frowning, Eli looked up and met Thrawn’s eyes, his brow furrowed in confusion.

“You told me earlier that you’re ‘not cut out’ for the missions we’ve been assigned,” Thrawn continued. “And yet, when it comes down to it, you are ready to jump into action to do the right thing regardless of the cost to yourself.” He smiled tightly. “The skills necessary for these missions can be learned. The heart required to do them rightly is something that must come naturally. You have that heart, Eli.”

“I, uh—I—but—” Eli fumbled for words, embarrassment pulling his gaze downward, his entire face now flushed. “I don’t know, sir.”

“I do.”

Reluctantly, he met Thrawn’s eyes again. Thrawn was never anything but sincere, and Eli felt his stomach twist. Time and time again, Thrawn had proven that he had special insight into nearly everything they encountered. Sometimes—often—Eli was jealous of such skill, but he was also amazed to see it in action. So if Thrawn said he saw that in Eli, then there must be some truth to it. Even if Eli couldn’t see it yet himself.

“Well, thank you, sir,” Eli said with a shy smile. “And you’re welcome. I would do it again in a heartbeat.”

The hand on Eli’s leg tightened briefly. “I know.”

Eli reached down and grabbed Thrawn’s hand with his own, giving it a grateful squeeze.

Then he frowned and huffed an irritated breath through his nose. “But they seriously let them go? After all that?”

Thrawn’s head tilted to the side. “They have been given a relief for cause, discharged from the service for dishonorable behavior.”

Eli snorted and looked away.

“Did you honestly expect anything different?”

“No, not really,” Eli mumbled. “Hoped, I guess. What they did—and what they intended to do—was detestable. I can’t even understand—” He stopped, biting his lip and clenching his hand into a fist. “They deserve more than that. But...” He sighed, his shoulders slumping. “I guess none of that would necessarily change anything of consequence. They would keep on being what they are, and at least this way they won’t be able to attempt anything more.”

Thrawn nodded. “Changing the opinions of others is not easily done, and many are unwilling to acknowledge when they are in the wrong. Until one recognizes that within oneself, change and growth cannot occur.”

Eli grimaced. That he could certainly believe.

“We also seem to have been given some extended leave time,” Thrawn added, raising an eyebrow significantly.

“Really?” Eli sat up a bit straighter. Then he laughed darkly. “Do they think that will make up for it?”

Thrawn shrugged. “Perhaps. Perhaps not. But we have been commanded not to pursue the matter further ourselves.”

Eli laughed again, shaking his head. “I see.” Then he sighed, swinging his legs around as he shifted to the edge of the bed. “Well, where do you want to go?”


End file.
